WHEN YOU FIND THE COURAGE TO SPEAK UP ABOUT ABUSE, IT'S AMAZING WHAT HAPPENS!

To those of you who have kindly subscribed to this blog .. then wondered where I am ... I'm here and feeling awesome! I feel awesome because this is probably the best thing I've ever done for myself: speaking out about my own sexual abuse and in the process, discovering so many wonderful women (and men!) whose stories are similar to mine and who, like me, are trying to turn something so negative into a big positive. And they are succeeding!

Over the past week, I've discovered Patricia Singleton, whose blog posts, like this one about learning to love yourself after abuse, offer comfort and inspiration. Patricia should know: like so many of us, she too has suffered at the hands of a sexual abuser. Then there's Lynn Tolson, whose books are helping so many others as she speaks out about her own abuse. I could go on listing one after another: I had no idea that many people are blogging about their abuse. You'll find links to some of these in my BLOGROLL on the right-hand side. I can't stress enough how important and helpful it is to read the posts by these victim/survivors. You might say you don't want to hear or read more: it brings up too many bad memories. To that, I can only offer the little poem I penned this afternoon while thinking about this very thing. You'll find it at the end of this blog.

It's also gratifying to see the membership on my Facebook page, OUT FROM UNDER, growing daily as I share relevant graphics posted by others or designed by myself. Folks love sharing these. Those who need them are comforted by them. Others are forced to think about them and face their own reality, painful as it might be. This IS necessary if we are to heal.

And best of all for me is that this voyage of self-discovery and disccovery of others has got my writing mind into gear after years of silence. So many times I've wanted to write, but I'm not a fiction writer. I can only write what I truly know ... and my own story is what I know best. Now that I've begun, I don't want to stop. I have other things that must be done but I'm finally making room and time for myself. Do you know how good that feels? I cannot encourage those of you who visit this page, my facebook page or simply lurk trying to get up the courage to tell your story, to just go and do it! It's truly amazing how good it can feel when you finally come out from under!

It's too easy when you're obsessed with a subject like incest, especially your own, to spend too much time on the negatives and to convey too many negative messages to your readers. I don't want to do that with every one of my blog posts, as much as I want to share my story with you. That you can read when I finally finish writing that book. So in the meantime, let me leave you now with that little poem I mentioned. Please share it, and this blog, with others whom you feel need to hear its message. And thanks for reading today's post.

COME OUT FROM UNDER

Yes, you must face the pain

But reliving it again and again

Wallowing in despair gets you nowhere

except further under

You know you want to tell

You've tried to for many years

You start to speak, then shut your mouth

And your face dissolves in tears 

of fear and self-loathing

But this has to stop!

The abuser should feel the shame

The abuser should wear the guilt

The abuser is to blame 

for what you feel

Reach out to those who care

Love yourself that much! 

Let their open arms embrace you 

And heal you with their touch

COME OUT FROM UNDER

                      

                           ©Viga Boland 2012